Chandrashekhar's First Day at School in America

This came into my inbox today. Warning: obscenities ahead!

It was the first day of school and a new student named Chandrashekhar Subrahmanyam entered the fourth grade. The teacher said, “Let’s begin by reviewing some American History. Who said “Give me liberty, or give me death”? She saw a sea of blank faces, except for Chandrashekhar, who had his hand up: “Patrick Henry, 1775” he said.

“Very good!” Who said “Government of the people, by the people, for the people, shall not perish from the earth?” Again, no response except from Chandrashekhar. “Abraham Lincoln, 1863” said Chandrashekhar.

The teacher snapped at the class, “Class, you should be ashamed. Chandrashekhar, who is new to our country, knows more about its history than you do.”

She heard a loud whisper: “Fuck the Indians!”

“Who said that?” she demanded. Chandrashekhar put his hand up, “General Custer, 1862.”

At that point, a student in the back said, “I’m gonna puke.” The teacher glared around and asked “All right! Now, who said that?” Chandrashekhar said, “George Bush to the Japanese Prime Minister,1991.”

Now furious, another student yelled at Chandrashekhar, “Oh yeah? Suck this!”

Chandrashekhar jumped out of his chair waving his hand and shouted to the teacher, “Bill Clinton, to Monica Lewinsky, 1997!”

Now with almost a mob hysteria someone said “You little shit! If you say anything else, I’ll kill you!”

Chandrashekhar frantically yelled at the top of his voice, “Gary Condit to Chandra Levy, 2001.”

The teacher fainted. And as the class gathered around the teacher on the floor, someone said, “Oh shit, we’re fucked!” and Chandrashekhar said quietly, “George Bush, Iraq, 2005.”

Tags: Humor, Politics

Updated at: 23 September 2005 7:09 PM

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